Sunday, July 4, 2010

It has been a while since I posted. I hit a block in what I felt I could write. Much of what I want to scream about is deeply personal to Herrad. She is a strong dignified woman but MS leaves her hurt and vulnerable. It has taken her away ability to control her body and it can be humiliating for her. I make it as matter of fact and straight forward as I can when it happens but I know she feels it deeply so I have not found it easy to write 'Herrad crapped her knickers in bed this morning' and put it on the net. I know she shares a lot of her experience with her blog friends but that is her sharing her own life. I feel like a cad for talking about it.
Herrad posted some photos of her self that she found difficult to look at herself.http://accessdenied-livingwithms.blogspot.com/ I think she looks like a beautiful women who has MS but she saw herself robbed of her looks and strength.
Herrad says in her last post that she is accepting what she looks like now. Maybe I can write a bit now.

5 comments:

mortonlake said...

MS robs us of so much richie,mobility,dignity,the things "normal"people take for granted.herrad is a very brave lady.and you my friend are one hell of a good carer.so yes,you can allow yourself to write.take care mort. love to herrad x

Webster said...

Richie, You have been a wonderful loving caring partner to Herrad. Getting upset at having to, again yet again, wash and change her and the bedding would be a normal reaction. You know it's not her fault. She knows it's not her fault. And we all know it's the fault of this very difficult disease. It's hard to live with MS and Herrad does it beautifully, and with great strength. You care for her beautifully and with great strength. Never forget it and never doubt it. Consider yourself ((((Hugged))))

Unknown said...

Richie, incontinence whether bladder or bowels or both is just living with MS. As a caregiver spouse I have changed adult diapers for more years than I ever changed diapers for our daughter. MS is cruel. Yet we as caregivers are the counterbalance.

Caregivingly Yours, Patrick

Herrad said...

Hi Richie,
You are wonderful, my hero even bifore the MS and now even more so for how well you look after me.
Love,
Herrad
ps love Webster's hug.

Have Myelin? said...

two lovers talking to each other, two bloggys talking to each other.

powerful for us to see and learn from.